Personal experience as a father

So many parents miss this out. I should know because I had two grown up boys that I missed to guide because of my “lack of time” during my younger years as a teenage father.

Being there for your child

I was a failure in the past in this area, but I know its not yet too late for me to experience “Fatherhood.” By the grace of our creator, I was given another chance of becoming a father at my ripe age of 40s.

Most parents thought that the way to raising their kids was by ensuring that they have a good future. This means having to work hard to ensure that they get the best possible thing we can provide. However, we tend to believe that just by working or running your business, you are already a good parent.

We don’t take the time to explain that what we are doing is for them because we think they won’t understand.

What we do not know is that our kids simply need us to be there for them. They want us to be beside them when they run, when they fall, when they feel good, and when they feel bad.

  • Believe me, no child has ever thanked God for a beautiful toy without his father.
  • No child has ever thanked God for a wonderful party at an expensive hotel without his Dad.
  • No child has ever thanked God enough for an award in school without his parents being present.
A happy family with three children at home

Children equate love with time

In short, for kids, they measure love by the time we give to them.

The time we spend so hard earning money for them, is actually the same time they crave from us. They want to enjoy the things we have been trying to provide them with us!

We need to find time to do even the following things:

  • Stroll with them
  • Play with them
  • Eat lunch with them
  • Cry with them
  • Laugh with them
  • Do foolish childish things with them

If we don’t ever set aside time for these things, then we have missed out the most important definition of love for them.

How they define love from what they experience from us, is most likely the same love they will show to their future family.

That is scary.

The same Dad who goes to work early in the morning and goes home very late at night from a drinking spree with his work comrades because of career politics will be replicated.  The same mom who goes home late from the pressured work and overtime to help the family make ends meet. The child’s definition of love will only be based on how we “demonstrated” it to them.

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